Tuesday, 24 December 2013

Surf, Sex, Violence 85 - 86 (17)

Many people forget that there was a prequel to this party, three years before, an affair that resulted in your's truly vomiting on Clyde's mom's curtains in the afternoon and later creating a pink pavement pizza with calamari tentacles as an artistic touch...but that was only a warm-up for  the party to end all parties! I think right from the get go, we confused, 'Toga party!' with, 'Roman orgy!' and that's where the wheels fell off, right there...

We slept on the beach on the night of the actual birthday and scored some super-glassy little waves the next morning. During the night the navy was doing some exercises with live tracer fire and we were treated to a cool light show. Funniest thing is I remember Clyde standing on top of the sand dune in the morning before we paddled out and having a shit that came out like fucking antelope droppings and rolled down the dune...piss funny to see!

Then it was time for the togas! The drinking really kicked off then...I remember us chasing Tony Kellner through the shopping center where we went to buy booze, staggering around in our togas, creating mayhem, and the party was still two days away! We just kept going anyway...

Then came the main event...
Nobody was allowed in unless they had a toga.
All male guests would be head butted by Jack and made to skull a beer on arrival.

It was utter chaos and things got out of hand pretty fast. We had early scenes where the beautiful food, that had been so lovingly prepared by Clyde's step-mom and sister, became just so much ammo in the food fight that erupted, after we had set an appropriate example. That was the first time I heard Patricia swear, I think she called me a 'fucking little bastard!' I was shocked! I think she thought that I started it but it was Clyde, we just accelerated it!
The house had beautiful wooden flooring and the whole downstairs floor was awash in beer, vomit and probably some semen by the time this was over. Clyde was locked in his room with a young little tight hard-body, while his ex was scratching on the door, lamenting her woes.
My toga had been ripped off and possibly burned by this stage so I had a dishcloth wrapped around me, held on by a safety pin. I have a vague recollection of being in a tight spot for putting my cock into someone's hand...(read my mothers hand )

There was so much more that went down but it's probably better to let it lie as I have no idea of the statute of limitations on some of the crimes I was party to...ha ha!

All said and done...
...without a doubt the best and most memorable party ever!

( the heaviest party ever was still to come however, but we will get to that night of violence and excess in Port Elizabeth soon enough)

Told by Leroy.

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